Showing posts with label hunger. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hunger. Show all posts
This will be my sixth day of restarting my healthy eating. The scale is pretty static, which is fine. I think I dropped a bit of water weight at first, and now the slower fat-burning should begin. As it should.
I am not eating low-cal, so I don't expect to see pounds MELT away. I am keeping to 1800 cals (more or less, I don't stress if it's 50 or so over or 50 or so under). This has been MAJOR for me, as I have not been able to do these many days of on-plan eating in a long, long time. Mentally, I just got to a place where I could begin again, and here I am.
Hydration is good, but I do think given it's summer-hot here, it could be upped. On training days, I work HARd. On non-training days...meh. But I did burn some cals yesterday after class doing a lot of lifting, bending, pushing, etc, with some housework. I had AMAZING energy despite too little sleep for too many days.
I think if I can just get to bed earlier and get some rest, I'll see the scale move swifter. I've noticed in the past there IS a relation between sleeping long and well and losing faster.
My Pilates trainer took pics of me yesterday. She often compliments my form and another trainer also comments on how I have good form. And they don't add "for a fat person". :) (I do try hard, given the obstacles of my belly/other-fat.) My main problem is a shoulder hitch (my brother does the same, and I think it's from years of asthma--and asthmatics will understand what I mean about the "trying to breathe posture".)
She wanted to document me yesterday, and I let her take pics to show my hubby. It was a new and strange thing to see myself in the poses. Of course, like many obese women, I think of myself as NOT AS BIG as I am when I can't see myself. But the camera doesn't give room for self-delusion. This is part of the reason I take (and post) more pics of myself now. I need to be REAL and SEE what the damage of overeating is.
If you haven't taken "before pics", I encourage you to do so. They won't let you fool yourself if you're so inclined (like so many of us).
When she emails the shots to me, I'll maybe post some. It's tough. I mean, I'm wearing skin-tight capri-leggings and a paper-thin t-shirt. But, if it helps another fatty fatfighter get into the gym or Pilates studio, it'll be worth it. How often do you see a morbidly obese woman doing a teaser move on the Cadillac? Hmm?
Today is my 27th wedding anniversary, so it's unlikely I'll post again (unless hubby takes a nap between activities, and he's so gung-ho over World Cup, I'm lucky to pry him away from the flat screren hahahahah). The World Cup was on in 1982 when we were first dating (the first month of our mad, mad love), so it is notalgic for me to have an anniversary with it.
My appetite feels calmer in the last couple days. I don't feel the raging mad desire to stuff. I hope it continues (but I know that's a wild wish). It's nice to eat 1/3rd of my usual breakfast calories and feel okay. I want to stay low for B and L, cause dinner will be our festive event.
I wish you all a happy Friday and a great weekend. Please treat yourself kindly. Eat beautiful produce. Drink lots of clean water. Hug and kiss your loved ones. And remember that no matter how much space you take up in this world, you are unique and valuable and worthy of love and appreciation.
later....
I had gotten pretty busy and didn't spark for a couple days. Holidays sort of make the focus go onto something OTHER than the routine, than journaling, etc.
But, I never had my mind totally off what I needed to do. I didn't exercise Thursday or Friday, so I have my sneakers on and plan to do my alloted cardio before showering for whatever we're gonna do this evening. I've eaten fine today, and I'm not terribly hungry at the moment, either.
So, the holiday and Black Friday:
Thursday: I ate breakfast, cause I knew dinner would be round 4 or 5 pm, depending on the turkey's doneness. We outdid ourselves this year, as the food was especially delicious (and plentiful, of course). My contribution was an organic salad with arugula, watercress, pears, dried cranberries, blue cheese with raspberry vinaigrette and toasted pecans. I thought it was great, the blend of sweet from the fruits and dressing, earthy and peppery from the greens and pecans, and the sour-deep taste of the cheese crumbles. I also took a veggie platter with assorted raw veggies. This way, I knew I'd have lots of F/Vs to select from. Instead of making the low-fat chocolate cake and baked apples, I spazzed and got pumpkin pie and key lime pie at Whole Foods. It worked out. I had about two tablespoons worth of the insides of key lime pie (I hate the crust of those pies, graham crackers are icky to me). And that with a bit of whipped cream did me fine, along with a couple bites of dark Belgian chocolate (60% mini bites, not truffles).
Later that evening, at home from my family's gathering, I got peckish. In order not to totally go into food depravity, I heated up some lentil soup, had a pear, called it a night.
The scale was fine the next day, other than a little salt uptick. Salt has continued to bedevil me, so I have not returned to 266 (I'm at 268 and change). I have been in stasis, not losing, but the salt regain hasn't left cause I've indulged in the salties. My bad.
It's still thrilling to see me in the 60's, but I"m really ready to move on, here, peops!
Black Friday: I had a beef craving (again, what up with dat), so we went to Chipotle. I had part of the Barbacoa Bowl (I asked for very little rice and extra beans to give me fiber-fill-me-up) and had the guac for the good fats and flavor. Hubby let me have one of his beef tacos. That satisfied my beef craving, so I had a very light dinner of leftover turkey breast in light gravy with some organic whole cranberry sauce and sweet potatoes and fruit (papaya, orange).
Today, I've only had one meal--egg white garlic-tomato omelette with Ezequiel toast and St. Dalfour four fruits jam, Trop 50 orange juice lite, coffee.
I have noticed that when I have several 400 to 500 calorie meals in a row, my appetite is a bit quieter. When I have a a couple big meals in a row, my appetite readjusts upward. This makes me want to not binge, I can tell you. I like that I'm feeling calmer in terms of appetite, and I am so afraid to set up a binge by having a huge blow-out.
Anyway, I haven't lost this past week, I have held on except for salt bloat variations, and now it's time to lose a bit before Christmas sets up its obstacle course.
I have done some Sparking today--my breakfast, read some articles, etc--and I want to get my head on straight for a new week. I have my horrible tasting Zinc liquid supplement (since I kept coming consistently way low on that in my nutrition profile from my online food journal), and my B-complex/B12 tabs. I've got my Amazing Grass for an afternoon pick-me-up. I'm ready to tackle the next seven days.
On to my Saturday cardio, ab work, and stretching...
Enjoy your weekend, gals and ladies. And be very healthy in your choices~
But, I never had my mind totally off what I needed to do. I didn't exercise Thursday or Friday, so I have my sneakers on and plan to do my alloted cardio before showering for whatever we're gonna do this evening. I've eaten fine today, and I'm not terribly hungry at the moment, either.
So, the holiday and Black Friday:
Thursday: I ate breakfast, cause I knew dinner would be round 4 or 5 pm, depending on the turkey's doneness. We outdid ourselves this year, as the food was especially delicious (and plentiful, of course). My contribution was an organic salad with arugula, watercress, pears, dried cranberries, blue cheese with raspberry vinaigrette and toasted pecans. I thought it was great, the blend of sweet from the fruits and dressing, earthy and peppery from the greens and pecans, and the sour-deep taste of the cheese crumbles. I also took a veggie platter with assorted raw veggies. This way, I knew I'd have lots of F/Vs to select from. Instead of making the low-fat chocolate cake and baked apples, I spazzed and got pumpkin pie and key lime pie at Whole Foods. It worked out. I had about two tablespoons worth of the insides of key lime pie (I hate the crust of those pies, graham crackers are icky to me). And that with a bit of whipped cream did me fine, along with a couple bites of dark Belgian chocolate (60% mini bites, not truffles).
Later that evening, at home from my family's gathering, I got peckish. In order not to totally go into food depravity, I heated up some lentil soup, had a pear, called it a night.
The scale was fine the next day, other than a little salt uptick. Salt has continued to bedevil me, so I have not returned to 266 (I'm at 268 and change). I have been in stasis, not losing, but the salt regain hasn't left cause I've indulged in the salties. My bad.
It's still thrilling to see me in the 60's, but I"m really ready to move on, here, peops!
Black Friday: I had a beef craving (again, what up with dat), so we went to Chipotle. I had part of the Barbacoa Bowl (I asked for very little rice and extra beans to give me fiber-fill-me-up) and had the guac for the good fats and flavor. Hubby let me have one of his beef tacos. That satisfied my beef craving, so I had a very light dinner of leftover turkey breast in light gravy with some organic whole cranberry sauce and sweet potatoes and fruit (papaya, orange).
Today, I've only had one meal--egg white garlic-tomato omelette with Ezequiel toast and St. Dalfour four fruits jam, Trop 50 orange juice lite, coffee.
I have noticed that when I have several 400 to 500 calorie meals in a row, my appetite is a bit quieter. When I have a a couple big meals in a row, my appetite readjusts upward. This makes me want to not binge, I can tell you. I like that I'm feeling calmer in terms of appetite, and I am so afraid to set up a binge by having a huge blow-out.
Anyway, I haven't lost this past week, I have held on except for salt bloat variations, and now it's time to lose a bit before Christmas sets up its obstacle course.
I have done some Sparking today--my breakfast, read some articles, etc--and I want to get my head on straight for a new week. I have my horrible tasting Zinc liquid supplement (since I kept coming consistently way low on that in my nutrition profile from my online food journal), and my B-complex/B12 tabs. I've got my Amazing Grass for an afternoon pick-me-up. I'm ready to tackle the next seven days.
On to my Saturday cardio, ab work, and stretching...
Enjoy your weekend, gals and ladies. And be very healthy in your choices~
Well, I just had a breakfast blow-out.
Fortunately, it was on healthful foods, and not super-fatty/big meats/fried/sugary ones, like say a Denny's Grand Slam.
First, let me say I fell asleep on the couch watching the election results. ZzzzZZzzz. Woke up about 4.5 hours later and had to take some meds. Then read my local paper and thought, "Geez, I'm hungry. But I'm still sleepy. But I'm coughing, so maybe should stay up." This went on for hours. I did some reading. I kept thinking, "Geez, I'm hungry."
Anyway, chopped up some veggies, heated up some Mama Lupe's low-carb, high-fiber tortillas. Whisked up one egg with a couple egg whites. Ground, scooped, and brewed some killer good Ademe Bedane coffee from Terroir (who have some of the best beans I ever brewed), heated up the skillets, sauteed my veggies with Pam Olive Oil (organic)--spinach, zucchini, green peppers, onions, mushrooms--and got the low-fat cheddar and fresh salsa for garnish. Made me two breakfast tortillas (which would normally run me 450 calories for both, over 10 grams of fiber, more if you count the fiber in the two cups of coffee I slurp up).
But then I had this spasm and heated up leftover slow-cooker oatmeal (from earlier in the week) and threw some canned lite peaches and a 1/4 cup skiim milk on top. Had a cup of coconut water, too, as I was bloated from the ham I had last night.
So, I can't say I didn't fuel up! And I got 4 of my fruits and veggies in, 6 plus to go. (In the past, whenever I've lost weight and lost it consistently, it was o nly when I stuck to 10 to 11 fruits and veggies per day and counted points/calories while journaling. It's the journaling that taught me I do best when my produce intake is quite high, ideally 11 F/V's per day. That's a lot of planning, shopping, cooking. I know what's ahead of me if I wish to succeed. F/V's. Lots of them.)
To be honest, though, I had planned yesterday to have a good breakfast so I could just have soup or protein mix (I love that Dessert Lean in Banana Pudding) and keep my tummy unfull for my late afternoon training session at the Pilates studio. I don't do well exercising with any real food in my stomach. The reflux acts up.
Breakfast totalled out to 614 calories (about 12 points), with 86 grams of carbs, 18 of fat, and 45 protein.
This leaves me, at miximum, about 1300 calories for the rest of the day, which is a lot (dieting-wise), though not a lot from what I'm used to (non-dieting-wise). I have to get used to less food, and I know it's gonna be trying. I'm not good at reducing food intake. I feel deprived and cranky. So, I need to work on my mindset and patience...
If you haven't had a healthful breakfast yet, go on. Do it. Remember your fruits/veggies and fiber. And WATER! (I am sooo bad with water.)
I wish all fatfighters a happy, healthy Wednesday!
I updated my weigh-in at left, sidebar, and it's not good news.
The lethargy continues. I did see my new endocrinologist on Tuesday, and I need to get to the lab for the blood test. I'm still feeling muffled, damped down, apathetic, though I'm self-talking like mad, trying to get my spirit revved up. And on top of all that, I gotta get my uterus biopsied after getting ultrasound results. Lovely. It's been the year of the medical appointments. Four so far with three docs.
But seeing the increase on the scale is always that little shock to the system, and it doesn't help the mood. I want to feel angry enough to get the mojo back, but all I feel is defeated. I won't wallow too long, but it's the emotion of the moment.
As if I didn't already know, I read an article today, which says what a lot of us already know by trial and error--it's the calories. The rest plays an assisting role--exercise, group support, journals, green tea, supplements--but it's all about the calories. Whether it's via self-control and strategy and planning, or via gastric bypass or via gastric banding or via stomach stapling or via diet pills: The reason people lose the weight is cause they EAT FEWER CALORIES.
The benefit of surgical/medical intervention is that it offers an escape from hunger. Doing it the old-fashioned, low-tech way means you really do have to learn to live with some or a lot of hunger, which, frankly, sucks monkey butt.
Here's an excerpt from "It's Not What You Eat, It's How Much," but you might wanna read the whole thing over at ABC News:
So, off to see how well I manage the hunger and food choices today. I'm telling myself to be good, to nurture the optimism, to find my inner warrior.
My inner warrior now needs to get my outer wimp over to the kitchen, where a whole papaya sits on the counter, waiting to be prepped for breakfast--yeah, breakfast. I woke up today at 12:30 and I've moped around feeling like I didn't sleep at all. Lack of energy sucks monkey butt, too.
I want to have eggs and toast and papaya and coffee. I have a mango I can have with lunch, which will probably be a light soup (I took the cans out of the pantry last night and put them on the counter, so I wouldn't ignore them.) A tiny bit of conscious effort to remedy the sad upward course of my weight since late last year.
I could do so much better, I know, if I didn't feel this pressing lethargy. I feel like I'm walking through concrete, like my face is this flat, expressionless mask. I wish I could give up feeling sucky for Lent.
Now, off to get this day going. With some hope, some prayer, and a papaya. :)
Have a great Thursday.
The lethargy continues. I did see my new endocrinologist on Tuesday, and I need to get to the lab for the blood test. I'm still feeling muffled, damped down, apathetic, though I'm self-talking like mad, trying to get my spirit revved up. And on top of all that, I gotta get my uterus biopsied after getting ultrasound results. Lovely. It's been the year of the medical appointments. Four so far with three docs.
But seeing the increase on the scale is always that little shock to the system, and it doesn't help the mood. I want to feel angry enough to get the mojo back, but all I feel is defeated. I won't wallow too long, but it's the emotion of the moment.
As if I didn't already know, I read an article today, which says what a lot of us already know by trial and error--it's the calories. The rest plays an assisting role--exercise, group support, journals, green tea, supplements--but it's all about the calories. Whether it's via self-control and strategy and planning, or via gastric bypass or via gastric banding or via stomach stapling or via diet pills: The reason people lose the weight is cause they EAT FEWER CALORIES.
The benefit of surgical/medical intervention is that it offers an escape from hunger. Doing it the old-fashioned, low-tech way means you really do have to learn to live with some or a lot of hunger, which, frankly, sucks monkey butt.
Here's an excerpt from "It's Not What You Eat, It's How Much," but you might wanna read the whole thing over at ABC News:
In terms of dieting, community support can be critical but choosing a plan is up to an individual, and the hardest part of losing weight may be accepting the hunger factor.
Past studies have shown that calorie restriction is the biggest determining factor for successful weight loss, even greater than exercise.
"There are those with unrelenting optimism, who think [dieting] is going to get easier," said Marlene Schwartz, deputy director of the Rudd Center for Food Policy and Obesity at Yale University. "But if you are eating fewer calories than you are burning, you are going to be hungry."
But the study's findings encourage experimentation, Sacks said, and the flexibility to find the best balance of calorie restriction and satisfaction for individuals.
"The hardest thing, having been born and raised in America, [was that] I thought I was entitled to eat as much as I wanted whenever I wanted and I would stay the same weight," Termini said. "But you can't do that. And it's not healthy."
So, off to see how well I manage the hunger and food choices today. I'm telling myself to be good, to nurture the optimism, to find my inner warrior.
My inner warrior now needs to get my outer wimp over to the kitchen, where a whole papaya sits on the counter, waiting to be prepped for breakfast--yeah, breakfast. I woke up today at 12:30 and I've moped around feeling like I didn't sleep at all. Lack of energy sucks monkey butt, too.
I want to have eggs and toast and papaya and coffee. I have a mango I can have with lunch, which will probably be a light soup (I took the cans out of the pantry last night and put them on the counter, so I wouldn't ignore them.) A tiny bit of conscious effort to remedy the sad upward course of my weight since late last year.
I could do so much better, I know, if I didn't feel this pressing lethargy. I feel like I'm walking through concrete, like my face is this flat, expressionless mask. I wish I could give up feeling sucky for Lent.
Now, off to get this day going. With some hope, some prayer, and a papaya. :)
Have a great Thursday.
I'm about to hit another glass of water, cause I am feeling mighty peckish.
I had a sizable breakfast (egg white with spinach, mushroom, and red pepper frittata with cheese and apple juice),and a too large late lunch after Pilates--which was grueling, cause I'm still congested--and used up all my points. I just seemed to be this aching hole and instead of being satisfied with sandwich and veggies and soup, added on yogurt with fruit and granola and a latte.
I'm gonna try to ride it out a bit, but if it gets worse, I'll cave and have something light (ie, 200 to 300 cals) just so I don't have a total binge. Maybe some Cheerios and berries, so I don't have to fiddle with heating stuff up and smelling food smells.
Grrr. I hate when I don't spread the points out better.
I hope y'all were smarter than I was today.
I'm glad I exercised. :)
~
I had a sizable breakfast (egg white with spinach, mushroom, and red pepper frittata with cheese and apple juice),and a too large late lunch after Pilates--which was grueling, cause I'm still congested--and used up all my points. I just seemed to be this aching hole and instead of being satisfied with sandwich and veggies and soup, added on yogurt with fruit and granola and a latte.
I'm gonna try to ride it out a bit, but if it gets worse, I'll cave and have something light (ie, 200 to 300 cals) just so I don't have a total binge. Maybe some Cheerios and berries, so I don't have to fiddle with heating stuff up and smelling food smells.
Grrr. I hate when I don't spread the points out better.
I hope y'all were smarter than I was today.
I'm glad I exercised. :)
~
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